1.04

March 7, 2012

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MysticJanus
MysticJanus
September 14, 2012 9:41 pm

A few suggestions for the last
panel.

First box: “Kaeso Cetus Menkar, called ‘Scaurus’
by the Alfar, was a marshal all his own. Enemy to all who weren’t
like him.”

Just a note, the second narration box in the last panel has a confusing statement. Is the enemy king supposed to be Syrma’s father? If so, then I would suggest changing it to, “He owed a debt to Syrma’s father, to whom he had sworn loyalty.”